You go to Starbucks on the way to work - and someone comments, "Oh you got some Starbucks this morning, huh?" - Well, yes, in fact, that is why I am holding a cup of it in my hand.
Or, you buy a new outfit or get a new haircut - and several women comment, "Oh, you got a haircut!" or "Oh, that looks new, did you just get it?" or "Oh, look at you!"
Most of this well-intentioned, I know. But sometimes, doesn't it get repititious having people comment on little details? Sometimes I just want to enjoy that I got Starbucks as a treat and I'd rather no one took notice of it! Is that weird?
Does this come from living in a society where we are constantly getting new things and we have just programmed ourselves to comment on things - whether meaningful compliments or not? Is it a lesson in how much we waste our words on things that are not very important, perhaps?
Maybe it is because I am pregnant that I am overly sensitive to these things. While I actually feel I have gotten a "get out of jail free" card in how few comments I've gotten overall and how few touches from the lady I've never met before - I anticipate it much more heavily when the baby actually arrives. I'm gearing up for people thinking she is a boy out of ignorance; for people who don't like her name and think that they have a God-given right to tell me so; for people who have all kinds of opinions on the way we care for our child...the list goes on. And I'm sure other parents would agree with me in having many stories where they've encountered this. One thing that is a great benefit of walking through a new season, like being pregnant or becoming a parent or getting married, is that you do become more thoughtful overall to what you say to someone in that season once you've walked through it - though parenting seems to be somewhat of an anomalie in this way to some, particularly strangers.
These kind of thoughts are from the pessimist in me that people don't really expect. Overall I'm optimistic - but I would hope that I am not an ignorant optimist. I think cynics of the world see optimists as ignorant or dumb a lot of times, thinking foolishly that the world could be something it is not in reality. But I think many optimists are more like myself than many would think from first glance - a sort of optimistic realist. I try to test things I see and think through them, and obviously this topic is one of those things I am thinking through from not as optimistic an angle.
We will see how it turns out - and in the end, I am praying that God would grant me the grace to respond however I need to in order to honor Him amidst negative or positive comments toward our little girl and our family. People are still people, after all, and I've been guilty of the very thing I've written about no doubt. Sometimes it's just nice to raise awareness of nuances in our culture, even if for my own benefit :)
"If we get overlooked for affirmation or promotion, so be it. Let's just do our jobs.
If we get elevated and celebrated, so be it. Let's just do our jobs.
Let's pursue a walk with God so close that the spotlights of this world - be they for us or against us - are eclipsed by His enormous shadow cast on our path."
- Beth Moore, Esther Bible Study Workbook
